Downer Thursday

My dearest TAG, my love,



I'm feeling fairly despondent tonight, and so, in order not to drag you down with me, I will be brief.



I don't know what I can say to convince you that I am totally, madly, crazy in love with you. I try and tell you that, and it seems like I just stumble over my words. I don't know. I feel like my entire future is in jeopardy without you, and so I want to be with you.



In Hollywood, the boy confesses to the girl, tells her he loves her, apologizes. The girl takes the boy back, they live happily ever after. Isn't that how it's supposed to work?



It doesn't seem to be working out so well for this confessional boy. My friends keep telling me that I need to give it time, that I need to back off and let happen whatever will. I'm not very good at that sort of thing. I feel like you are so close, my TAG, and yet so far away. I know that I can make you the happiest woman alive, if you will just let me. Damn anyone who may say different. You, however, seem content with life as it is. I just want the best, and for me, you are the best.



I miss you more than I can adequately express. Words fail me tonight. I love you so. I hope someday you can read these words and realize the truth behind them, that a boy fell in love with a girl, didn't realize it until apparently it was too late, and now must live with this knowledge the rest of his life, that he let the best thing he would ever find in life go by the wayside, all because he was too cowardly to face his feelings in the open.



I will always, and I mean ALWAYS be here for you, my TAG. I will ALWAYS love you, and will ALWAYS be ready and willing to receive you with open arms, should that be your wish. I know we can be happy together.



I love you, baby. You and no other, for the rest of my life.



Love always,

B